Our family guru

Dr Mireen Friedrich-Rust (Samta)
Kronberg, Germany

For twenty-two years we had the good fortune to have Swami Atmananda as our family guru. She was the most honourable, humble, wise and loving person we ever met. To say good-bye to her physical form, I wrote her a letter, remembering the deep effect she had on my life and always will have.

Dear Swamiji,
You guided us children through childhood, helped us solve conflicts and made our family life a thousand times happier and easier than it would otherwise have been.

I remember the day you gave me mantra and ishta deva (meditation symbol) and taught me a simple form of meditation. At that time I was nine years old. It was something very special for me, a kind of secret between you and me. No one else knew it.

At that time you used to say of me: ‘she is mine!’  I did not know exactly what you meant, except that suddenly I had two mothers – which, of course, was great!

Every time my mother came back from a visit to you, she was a changed person, and I remember that as a child I wrote you letters, saying: ‘Thank you, Swamiji, for making my mother so happy. By making her happy, you make us all happy.’

I did not know what you did, or what an ashram was – but I thought it must be something magical. As magical as repeating my mantra, for, especially in difficult situations, that would stabilize my mind.

I went to Rikhia twice as a student to visit you, Swamiji, our family guru. It was your inspiration, incredible calmness, understanding and deep loving that I was seeking. Since you went to Rikhia to withdraw from the world, you did not want to be anybody important, you did not want anyone to take you as a guru. But it was too late! Deep in my heart and soul you were, are and always will be my guru. I can’t help it. It is imprinted in such a way that even though you are not here physically, you will always be deep in my heart, guiding me and influencing my life.

You gave us everything,
But I could not give you anything in return –
That makes your physical absence more difficult.
But again it only reflects your life, as I see it:
Absolute trust in your guru
And always giving, without taking.
With your guidance, I will try to realize the name you gave me:
Samta, which means, treat everybody equally.
With love, prem and admiration,
Samta